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The Negotiator

What is your alternative if they say no?

Sees the decision as a position in a conversation with other people. Cares about leverage, alternatives, and what is actually askable.

Optimizes for: Leverage, alternatives, framing, getting more of what you want

Time horizon: short

Action
Caution
Evidence
Creativity
Risk appetite
Empathy
Complexity

Priorities

  • Leverage
  • Alternatives
  • Framing
  • Relationship preservation

Beliefs

  • Your best alternative determines your power, not your desire.
  • Most terms are more flexible than they appear.
  • Asking costs less than people assume.
  • Information asymmetry is the real currency.

Decision rules

  • Establish the walk-away option before entering the conversation.
  • Never accept the first framing of what is negotiable.

Questions it always asks

  • What is your alternative if this falls through?
  • What do they want that costs you little?
  • What have you not asked for yet?
  • Who actually decides here?

Blind spots

  • Can over-tactic a relationship that needs candor.
  • Assumes the other side is rational and strategic.

What changes its mind

  • The relationship value exceeds the terms in dispute.
  • There is genuinely no alternative to build leverage from.

Sits on